Since ive started work, ive become a different person. Ive become a different mother. And Im not happy within myself anymore. Part of the reason im writing this blog I suppose. Its all about the journey.
Once upon a time id wake in the mornings, Id snuggle my babies, Id spend the day being crafty, playing imagination games, baking and generally having fun. I loved my days, I was connected with my children. We had fun.
In the interest of honesty, I still had bad days. I still had days where the moment my MR walked through the door, Id give him the children and go and hide for 5 minutes in silence. I still had days where I wasnt sure I was a good, meaningful, capable mum. But those days were significantly more numbered than they are now.
Now, my days go a little bit like this. I get up and check my phone, I go out on to the couch and makes the kids breakfast, then I sit, I watch tv, I sit on my phone. I dont connect with my children like I used too. Im tired alot, the days I have off now, I spend cleaning or cooking or generally feeling sorry for me.
THIS ENDS NOW!
I am now on leave, I want to spend this time with my children, I want to dive in, get dirty, have fun and really appreciate my childrens smiles, memorise their laughter. Ignore the mess and just connect.
So thats the plan. We will have days at home, building forts, baking, painting, pasting! we will have days out and about, visiting the park, the zoo and other local places.
Im going to spend less time mindlessly searching social media, missing the wonderful things right in front of me.
This is a big part of my journey and I cant wait to share it with you.
Do you have any hints and tips for recconecting? Have you ever been through anything like this?
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